Krishelle, did you come back? I’m so glad to see you,” Kevin said with hope in his voice when his flatmate came home.
“No, I came to pick up the rest of my things. I already told you that everything is over between us. How is it so? I love you. I don’t want to break up. I need you. I missed you so much all these days,” a week before that something that should not happen with spouses or flatmates happen to them. Kevin slapped Krishelle’s cheek while being angry.
The conflict started when he came home and found out that, as it seemed to him, there was a mess in the kitchen. Krishel was preserving “Menemen,” which is a Turkish food. There were different bowls, plates, and jars standing everywhere, and a 10-liter pot on the stove was covered with stains from an unruly tomato that burst and started to burn. There were plates with garlic, spicy pepper, and other foods in different parts of the kitchen. Krishelle was standing and cutting peppers like everything was okay.
They moved in together four months ago. Kevin lived alone for a long time before that. He agreed to leave his comfortable solitude for her and tried to make a family again, but he didn’t consider every detail.
They were both over 40 when they met. Krishelle had a grown-up daughter who was already working, and Kevin had a 10-year-old son from the first marriage whom he rarely saw, as his mother lived in another city. It seemed like there was nothing better than to find a person in this world with whom he would be as comfortable as he was by himself. At first, it seemed to Krishell that Kevin was exactly that person. She rejected her rented apartment and moved in with him when he offered.
Krishelle was trying to be a good wife. She hoped that she had met a man with whom she could be happy and possibly be together until they get old, although there was a lot of time before that. During his first months, she felt like flying from happiness. She would treat her loved one with different delicious foods that she would sometimes cook with literally the last bits of her energy. Sometimes she would even surprise herself with where she got so much energy from. It was definitely love; it couldn’t be something else.
A couple of months passed, and Kevin started to change. He’d come home from work enraged and angry. Sometimes he would mumble about some nonsense for the whole evening, that she didn’t wash the cup right away after having tea, or she didn’t mop the floors or she didn’t make the bed right. It seemed like it would make no difference, a cup, a floor, a bed. Does it even matter when there is almost perfect cleanliness in the house, a freshly made dinner on the table, and a loving person is next to you?
Krishelle herself was working. She would come back home an hour before her husband, but she managed to get everything done around the house and make dinner for a loved one. At first, she didn’t pay attention to his regular mumbling, but with time, it started to annoy her. She was quiet; she wouldn’t talk about it, hoping that it was temporary and that soon he would calm down, and everything would be okay again. She was waiting and waiting.
She would make preserves for the winter before that as well. She tried to get it done before Kevin came home. He would fix the car with his father-in-law from time to time; that’s why sometimes he would spend the entire weekend visiting his sister. That day he was also going to go there, but suddenly he came back and saw all that chaos.
That would turn into a few neatly put together jars with Menemen covered in the blanket in the future. Krishelle couldn’t understand why Kevin was so unhappy when he saw the mess. “How can you make preserves for a perfect cleanliness? There’s no way, Kevin. I’ll clean everything up soon,” she said, trying to keep her patience.
“What are you going to warm up for me, noodles with meatballs that I’ve been eating for three days already? It’s okay. I cannot get everything done at the same time. Menemen will not make itself. You asked for it yourself, did you forget? I got so tired today; I had to go to the store two times to bring heavy bags. I’m not here myself too, and you now decided to go crazy without any reason. Ah, now I’m also crazy. I came home; I wanted to be quiet and I want to eat. Does it make me a psycho? I didn’t call you a psycho,” she loudly said.
“Don’t yell at me,” Kevin argued. “It’s you who’s yelling at me. I’m just trying to calm you down. Enough already! My cans are going to burst if I will be angry. It’s my brain that will rather burst. How tired I am of all of this.”
Krishelle got extremely angry. “What exactly are you tired of? That you come home and you eat delicious food? Are you tired of sleeping on freshly washed linen? Are you tired that you are greeted with a smile when you come back from work? Are you tired that I don’t say a single bad word to you even when you are wrong? Or maybe you are tired of me and my presence in your house? Tell me what exactly you—”
“Yes, I am so tired of you, and I don’t need your dinners, washed linens, or that crappy Menemen. You know what? I’m tired of you as well. You always walk around and complain that you don’t like anything.
You’re a pessimist. It’s horribly depressing. You throw things around, but you’re asking for cleanliness. You don’t do the dishes after yourself, and you yell at me that I made a mess here, although I’m cooking. I asked you to take me to the vegetable store, but it was more important for you to help Kay, and your feet stink like hell. It’s you who I am tired of,” she yelled.
Kevin apparently didn’t like to hear much criticism about himself, or her facial expressions made him mad when she was saying all of that with a raised voice, but he couldn’t hold it and slapped her cheek. Krishelle did not expect it. At first, she wanted to slap him back, but then she realized that their powers were not equal. She decided not to risk her own health.
“Everything is over between us,” she hissed while being mad, and she left the kitchen. Krishelle started to pack her things; her hands shaking from unhappiness and hurt. She packed the things that she had the time to pack in two suitcases, quickly put on her jeans, and came out of the apartment. Kevin saw it all but didn’t even try to apologize or stop her.
That night, Krishelle stayed with her friend, and the next day she rented herself an apartment and moved there. She had to spend a lot of money on rent and the realtor’s service. Plus, she had to buy different things that she was missing in her new home. She didn’t have a single thought of going back to Kevin, at least for the first three days.
Then she felt sad in her soul; she recalled their argument, all the words that were said. They both did a good job. No, she realized that she could not forgive anything like that, but it still felt heavy on her soul.
Kevin didn’t call and didn’t look for her. Only that evening when she left, he sent her a text message, “And what do I have to do with Menemen? You can do anything you want with Menemen; I don’t care,” she replied in warm blood. Of course, she felt pity for her Menemen. She spent money on it. Another half-hour or 40 minutes, and everything would be done, but it turned out so nasty.
Krishelle even tried not to accept it, and she hoped and waited for Kevin to realize everything and come to her. He would ask for forgiveness, or at least he would call. But none of that happened. A week passed. She got a bit used to the thought that she is single again. She decided that it was time to pick up the rest of her things from Kevin’s apartment and give him his keys back.
Of course, she could do that when he was at work, but it seemed to her that it was so petty, like she was some kind of rat that got into a stranger’s house. No, she didn’t want it like that. She texted Kevin half an hour before her visit, saying that she would come soon. He met her at the door; he looked so guilty and upset, but somehow it didn’t make her softer, although it painfully picked at her somewhere deep inside her soul.
He was saying that he loved her and that he didn’t want to break up, but his actions didn’t match up with his words. If it was the truth, he would play a game of silence for the whole week. Would he not have enough bravery to find her and talk? No, Krishelle was looking at him and trying to get rid of the pain in her soul. She could not believe him. If he hits her once, he will hit her again.
“Kevin, stop lying to yourself and to me as well. If you really loved me, then you would do a bit more than nothing,” she said confidently, and she carefully moved him to open the door. Krishelle left, and he was standing there, just like he was, barely blinking, while trying to understand what he did wrong. Apparently, he still didn’t understand it.
They have never met again, although they used to tell each other tender words of love in the past. Krishelle was riding in the taxi and looking out the window. It was not just a fall on the street; it was also a fall in her soul. And then she suddenly remembered that fall is her favorite time of the year, and her birthday is coming up in two weeks. “Everything will be okay,” she whispered to herself and smiled.