His Marriage Is Less Than A Year Old But He Is Already Cheating With Me

I met Kwaku when I started a new position at my current workplace. There was something about him that drew him to me when he said “Hi” to me for the first time. That day I replayed his voice in my head repeatedly. Every time I did that, I smiled. There are people like that, you know. They imprint their mark on you after just one encounter.

The next time I saw him was when we closed from work. I was walking to the roadside to get a car so I was in a hurry. He walked up to me and said, “Slow down. Let me walk with you.” So I slowed my pace till he caught up to me. We spoke and exchanged contacts.

After that, we started talking. The more I got to know him the more I liked him. It got to a point where I started hearing that he is married. I didn’t believe it. He looked too young to be a married man. Besides, it didn’t come up in our conversations. However, the next time I saw him I watched his ring finger. That was when I saw his wedding band sitting happily on his finger.

After I saw it myself, I decided to kill my feelings for him and just be his friend. As our friendship progressed, we planned to hang out and spend some time together. I chose the beach because it was an open space. I felt I wouldn’t do anything silly in public in case my feelings started acting up.

We got to the beach, read some books and talked deeply about our lives. After a couple of hours of comfortable silence, he kissed me. Believe me when I say that I didn’t see it coming. I was so surprised, but I kissed him back. Later, he did it again, and again.

I allowed it to happen because of my feelings for him. I know he is married, but I also know he has feelings for me. He has confessed that he is not happy in his marriage. “As soon as we got married, my wife became cold. She treats me with so much nonchalance that you would think she did me a favour by marrying me,” he said.

According to him, his wife moved to her parent’s house for a while, because she couldn’t stand him. I don’t know if he did something to offend her or if that is just the nature of their relationship.

I asked him if he is responsible for her behaviour, but he hasn’t said anything. All he said was, “I poured all my love into her but she wouldn’t give me anything back. Everything she did when we were dating became nonexistent the moment we exchanged our marriage vows. It is as if, she put up a front to get the ring. And now, she has it so she is showing me her true colours.” He said it really affected him until he decided to look for happiness outside the marriage. That’s how I came into the picture.

I make him happy. He has told me this. And I know it’s true because I see it in his actions. I don’t know what happens when he gets home, so I can say for a fact that he is miserable at home. That’s not even my concern. My problem is the guilt I feel when I think about how things have turned out.

I didn’t plan for it to get this far but I have been having an affair with him for a while now. His marriage isn’t even a year old, but we’ve been together for six months. I hate what I am doing to a fellow woman but it seems I am not strong enough to walk away.

I’ve broken up with Kwaku several times but I love him so much that I find myself going back to him. I know it’s wrong. I know it’s not normal to feel this way about somebody’s husband. My feelings for him cannot justify how badly his pregnant wife would be hurt should she find out about us. That’s why I want it to stop. It’s just unfortunate that I can’t seem to walk away and never look back.

His wife is due soon so I’ve told him, we can’t go on anymore. “I can’t take the attention you have to give to your family away from them. Please let go,” I have said. He says, “I know, and I am doing everything to get my wife to love me back but she’s so comfortable with the way things are, that she doesn’t care.” I want to do the right thing but I feel for him.

I know a lot of you will criticize me for this but I can’t help it. I just need to know how to unlove him and leave him without going back again. If you can give any tips on how to get his wife to love him again too, I will share it with him.