Should You Walk Away If He Hit You Just Once?

Love they say happens when you least expect it. You could tell yourself, “I will never love again,” only to step out of your house and clash with the love of your life. No one can truly predict the way love moves. For instance, when I attended my friend Elliana’s birthday party, I did not expect to meet a man who would sweep me off my feet. It was at a time I found the party quite boring. Everyone had cosied up to whom they knew. And I didn’t know anyone but the celebrant. So I had no one to talk to.

I stepped out to get some fresh air and possibly something to munch on. That was when I encountered Godwin. Oh my, he was as dazzling as a twinkling star on a dark night. When he smiled, my knees went weak. The sound of his voice when he said, “Hello, how are you?” had my heart racing like a teenage girl with a crush. He smelled so good too. Seriously, I wanted to wrap myself in his arms because of his cologne. Everything about him that night took my breath away.

If our love was a fairytale, it would have been a beautiful tale woven by fate. Godwin and I had just met but we spent the rest of the night talking and laughing as though we had known each other for a very long time. By the time we parted ways that night I knew in my heart that we were going to end up together. As I went to bed that night I wondered, “How is it that just when I have given up on love, I have met someone who already makes the prospect of love welcoming.”

Just as I knew, we ended up together. We have been together for over seven months now and everything he has done so far has spelt out his love for me. Of all the people I have dated, he is the one who has loved me to the point where I know what love truly means. Everything about my life, he has made his business. While some men were intimidated by my nose for business, Godwin encourages me to embark on more ventures. That’s one thing I love about him.

He does little things here and there that I hold so dear to my heart. His goal is to make sure that I am comfortable. The default question he asks me is, “What do you need?” When it comes to my business, “What do you need?” When I am dealing with social problems, “What do you need?” And whatever assistance I need, he makes sure I get it. It is because of things like this that I always tell God, “Please, let him be my last man. He is so good that I don’t want to live my life without him.”

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A few days ago, we were having a conversation about a new business I was about to embark on. He assisted me by buying a machine for me to start the business. So I was surprised when he told me, “My elder brother called to tell me that he wants to use the machine I bought for you.” “Ah, how did your brother know that you bought me a machine?” I asked him. He told me that it didn’t matter and that I should just give him the machine.  I was very confused, “How can you make a decision about a machine I am about to use to start work without informing me first? I won’t give it to you.”

This turned into a heated argument. He said bitter things to me and I also said the same back to him. He had planned to set up a shop for me but I told him, “Don’t bother establishing a shop for me. In the end, it is your family members who will come for it.” He responded to my statement with something hurtful, and I gave it back to him in equal measure. The next thing I heard was “Wham!” Godwin had landed a slap on my left cheek. Maybe it was the shock I felt or numbness from the pain. All I knew was, I couldn’t even cry. He had never hit me until that day. The moment he realized what he had done, he sobered up and started apologizing. I told him, “You hit me. There is no coming back from this. We are over.”

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He has enlisted his mother, brother, and brother’s wife to join hands with him in his remorse. They are telling me that he is not abusive and that he must have lost control of his temper. This is a first offence so they want me to let it go and give him another chance. Godwin himself has been calling and texting me but I’ve refused to answer. I made a promise to myself that should any man I am in a relationship with hit me, for whatever reason at all, I will walk away and never look back. That’s why no matter how amazing he has been to me, I am finding it difficult to forgive him. Now my question is, am I overreacting? Should I listen to him and his family? I still love him but is one slap, not a red flag? Do I have to wait for him to slap me again and again before I leave him? I don’t have anyone to discuss this with. Please make a decision.

–Rosaline

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