She Had A Four Months Old Baby When We Got Married. Now, Her Ex Is Coming Back

My father walked out on us when I was quite young. My mother sold foodstuffs to sustain the family and I used to help her. We either took turns selling or we sold together on busy days. I did this even when I got to the university. The fact that I was a man helped me make more sales than my mother. The young ladies in our estate preferred buying their foodstuffs from me.

I enjoyed the attention and the money that came with it but that was where it ended. I didn’t have eyes for any of the young ladies. My life followed a particular routine until a young girl walked by my house selling toffees. I was moved by her beauty. When she stopped to ask if I wanted some toffees, I said yes and then bought everything.

The next day she came around again and I still bought everything she was selling. I didn’t have any use for the toffees. I just didn’t want her on the streets for so long. On the third day when she came around, my aunt told me not to buy all the toffees. She said, “If you buy everything she won’t go home immediately. She will use the opportunity to go and visit her friends. Allow her to go and sell.” I saw sense in what my aunt said. I let her go.

The next day I waited for her to pass by but she didn’t. When I didn’t see her for about a week, I became restless. I wondered about her most of the time. Is she alright? Did she get into trouble? Will she ever use the route that led her to me again? I didn’t see her again until a year later. She was walking with two girls engrossed in conversation. She didn’t even look my way. I didn’t know her name so I shouted, “Toffee wura” and she turned. When she saw that it was me, she shouted back “Eii customer.”

I asked her, “What happened to you? I never saw you again. “She answered, “I went to school. I am in SHS.” I took her number and promised to call her.

I called the number she gave me and it was a wrong number. I panicked at the thought of not seeing her again but I ran into her about a week later. I asked why she gave me the wrong number and she apologized. “It must have been a mistake.” She gave me the correct number this time and I made sure to check before she left.

We talked sometimes. I asked to see her and we met. I proposed to her and she accepted it.

She went back to school and so did I. She was in the boarding house. She didn’t take her phone to school so we barely spoke. After my graduation, I went back home and continued selling for my mum. She also completed SHS around that time. She had blossomed into a woman the next time I saw her. That was the same time I started hearing stories about her. I was told that men hovered around her as bees hover around honey. I asked her about it and she denied it. I became insecure and we often quarreled because of it.

I was posted to Kumasi for my national service. About a week before my departure, Akos broke up with me. “Why? What did I do?” I asked. She said “You didn’t do anything. I just want to be free this time.” I didn’t fight it. I didn’t push her to stay. I let her go and later moved to Kumasi.

In 2017 we started talking again. I was then working in Tamale. Apart from my main work, I was also working on a side hustle and things were going well. One of my clients came from Spain and I had to meet him in Accra. When I got to Accra, I found out that Akos had a baby.

I was shocked she didn’t say anything about it all the while we were talking. I asked where the father of the child was and she answered, “We are having problems so he is no longer in the picture.” A part of me was happy to hear that. I was still in love with her and wanted to be with her. Eventually, I moved back to Accra to pursue my business. At that point, Akos and I had gone beyond friendship. She visited me every weekend to cook for me. I also played the role of a father in her baby’s life even though he was just four months old.

At some point, I was too sure she was the one I wanted. Everything in me wanted us to be together for the long haul of things so I proposed marriage to her and she accepted it.

When I told my family about my plans to marry her they went ballistic; “What do you see in that girl? Has she bewitched you? Is she the only woman on earth?” Some friends even told me I had a mental problem. The question everyone asked me was, “Why would you want to marry a woman who has a four-month-old baby?” The answer was simple; love. I ignored everyone and went to my mother; “Mom, she is the only woman I can ever love. Please give me your blessing and let me marry her.”

She said, “If she makes you happy then so be it.” We got married not too long afterward.

Not too long ago, my father-in-law called us; He said, “The biological father of Akos’ child has called to apologize for abandoning his responsibilities. He wants to come into his child’s life and make things right. What do we do?” We have been able to raise the kid without his biological father and he is now five years old. Our boy knows only me as his father. I am concerned about how it would affect him if his father comes to claim him.

He’s young. I don’t want him to go through any psychological or emotional trauma. I feel he is too young to understand the dynamics of this change. He calls me daddy and I love him as mine. He is even bearing my surname. I am worried his father will come along and introduce confusion into our marriage. My Father-in-law keeps calling me. He wants to know my decision but I’m confused. When these figures come out of the shadows, they usually come along with issues that destabilize the peace in the family. That’s what I’m trying to avoid.