I Don’t want to be a Jehovah’s Witness anymore, but I’m Scared of losing my family- Lady Cry Out
I was 18 when I got hitched. I’ve been hitched for a very long time at this point.
I wasn’t permitted to have intercourse before marriage. You’re not permitted to drink a lot of liquor. You can’t spend time with school companions, you can just spend time with individuals in the religion.
We didn’t praise birthday celebrations, Christmas or Easter. We weren’t permitted to sing the public song of devotion at school, we’d need to remain situated — it would be truly humiliating.
We went to three love gatherings seven days.
We went seeing (entryway to-entryway lecturing) each Saturday morning, 9am-12pm. Each and every entryway, individuals wouldn’t be intrigued. I’d be so humiliated.
I was assaulted at 14 by somebody high up in the religion. I had curbed recollections from it, which just came out a couple of years back after my children were conceived.
I went to the seniors and disclosed to them everything. Also, he got secured by them.
My significant other had caused me grumble, yet after that he stated, “The seniors have managed it, simply leave it at that.”
I had the acknowledgment that I would not like to bring my children up in that way of life any longer.
Two years ago I stopped going to the weekly meetings and going witnessing. I don’t believe in God anymore.
The thing is, I’m actually living in the network. It’s hard. I can’t actually leave since I’ll get disregarded by everybody. I have a great deal of nervousness, so I would prefer not to be disfellowshipped.
My parents don’t really know how I feel. They live next door, they’re kind of hopeful I’ll come back to [the meetings]. It would just break them if they knew how I felt, because they’d have to cut me off.
They look after the kids a lot. They’re constantly praying around them, pushing the kids to believe. They actually told them Santa is bad, Santa is Satan. It’s pressure on me when I go out to the shops, and the kids say that out loud.
I told my husband I don’t believe anymore which caused us to separate at one point. We’re back together again because he wants to try for the kids. But he doesn’t feel he can love someone who doesn’t believe in the religion.
What can you say to this?